Several years ago I was working for the Harvard-Smithsonian Center for Astrophysics, in the Solar and Stellar X-Ray Group. In order to further my career in physics research I needed to pursue a graduate degree, and I was in the process of applying to physics graduate schools. Although I would have been capable of having a successful career as a research scientist, I had doubts about whether or not I would enjoy doing it.
Bradley pressed me as to why, and I explained that, while I firmly believe in the scientific method and the value of science to humanity, I did not get the feeling that I was discovering anything new. I had the distinct impression that the senior scientists thought that they already knew the answers to the questions they were asking and that they just needed to sufficiently show it. Bradley was rightly confused. He stated that what I described sounded like the scientific method - the scientists had a hypothesis and that they were trying to prove it.
This was an excellent point, and one that I did not address sufficiently at the time. What I meant was that the scientists seemed to assume that certain behaviors which had been observed in the Sun could be sufficiently explained by physical rules that were already known. They may have been correct, and the answers could potentially be useful to humanity. However, what I wanted to do personally was to discover fundamentally new laws of the universe, and I was not convinced that the course I was on would allow me to do that.
I was certainly considering shifting from Solar Physics to Cosmology or to something like Nuclear Physics, but I was not positive that those would ultimately appeal to me, either. For starters, there are precious few people who make a living being a Cosmologist. There's only one Stephen Hawking. Moreover, I was not keen on working on some huge experiment such as a particle accelerator where I was a single cog in a machine of hundreds of people and it would take years to complete. That reasoning is somewhat ironic considering the fact that Dark Void, my only completed game project at this point, easily topped a hundred people and a few years of development when all was said and done.
In order to complete the picture, I'd like to draw from the book I'm currently reading: Flow, by psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. The book explores what the author calls "optimal experience", or "flow". A person experiences the state of flow when all of his attention is completely focused on a single activity. Typically, the activity has clear goals, rules, and feedback; the participant has a sense of control and a chance of completing it; there are no distractions; and one's sense of time distorts. Athletes might know this state as "being in the zone". The author claims that these experiences are enjoyable because they allows us to grow and become more complex persons. There is a slight self-help vibe, as the book suggests that one can find happiness by finding flow. I'm definitely buying into the theory.
I mention Flow because it helps explain why I did not enjoy research science as much as I would have liked. There were few opportunities for flow experiences. There were certainly clear goals and rules, but the feedback was not timely and it was easy to get distracted. I honestly spent too much time waiting and twiddling my thumbs.
In contrast, I frequently experience flow when programming. Game programming provides ample opportunity to challenge my problem-solving skills, and I can readily find a zone when tackling a programming task. There's a huge sense of control because the computer does exactly what I tell it to do. I am creating a tiny universe all to itself, and instead of discovering the rules I'm making them up. Feedback is also clear and immediate - all I have to do is compile and run the game!
I also experience flow while playing video games. Anyone who has ever seen The Nutcracker ballet and thought that "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy" was "the Tetris song"; stayed up until 4 a.m. for "just one more match" in Street Fighter II; or killed monsters for hours on end in an MMORPG can attest to this.
Naturally, combining programming with video games was a big win. I know first-hand that by making a video game I am creating something that will enable other people experience enjoyment, and that is no small thing.
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